Keep those expectations in check, fellas.  ConnPost.com reports…

Masseuse visit goes awry, man arrested
By NOELLE FRAMPTON

A city man was likely more tense than ever after he hired a masseuse online for Monday night with the impression that she was, ahem, not exactly a masseuse, according to police.

The 20-year-old woman told police she agreed to the home appointment through Craigslist.org, came to the man’s home and began to massage him.

Unhappy with her services, the man wanted her to do more, the woman told police. When she refused, he allegedly pointed a pellet rifle at her and demanded his $200 back.

The woman fled at about 12:10 a.m. Tuesday, and as she and a man who had driven her to the appointment were speeding away, the irate customer threatened both of them and threw a brick into the car’s rear window and smashed it, said Officer Jeffrey Nielsen.

Police responded to the reported disturbance and charged the man with second-degree criminal mischief, two counts of threatening, two counts of reckless endangerment, breach of peace and unlawful restraint.